Ever Wonder

Sometimes I wonder what things would be like if they went in the complete direction in the beginning but then I think to myself that there is a specific reason why it doesn't always work out the way we plan.
It is still interesting to think about it though.
I wonder sometimes where I would be if I stuck to my first college major, why people lie, why people shy away when I tell them what degree I just graduated with, what it would be like to not be stabbed in the back by people who don't even know me but think they do, and what is in the near future for our little family.
There are things we can change but taking back words said, actions dealt, betrayal of others, and feelings hurt won't ever be repaired.
We all are guilty of doing something that has hurt another in one way or another but being able to humble yourself to say that you are truly sorry is a big step, only if the person you are saying sorry to is able to put everything behind them and move on (which doesn't always happen).
I am me and no one else, take it or leave it because you aren't worth my time to worry about. I am strong, independent, a free thinker, stubborn, level headed, and believe that laughter is great medicine.
Living in the past isn't going to get anyone, anywhere, so I choose not to live there and I look to the present as a stepping stone that I take on step into what the future holds all the while wondering what will be happening next!
Each day there seems to be a battle that ends with a victory much larger than the battle so I can only imagine what the day will hold.
I am not a perfect person as a matter of fact I am the farthest person from perfect and sorry if I come off that way while I am writing but I am a super proud mommy. I only cry tears if tears will be shed for me when needed and I laugh at times to get through the rough times of dealing with narrow minded people because it is my nervous instinct to laugh.
I do judge but I don't like to and everyone does it so why not just jump on the ban-wagon of life and just do it. If you read my thoughts and take them to heart, well maybe it is time to realize that I am just writing how I feel and it isn't meant to be personal, it is just my free speech. I write because I love to journal and writing in a book that will one day be gone just isn't doing it for me but being able to have others read it is a bit strange too. At least my family knows what John is currently up to.
I wonder where we will be in the next couple of months but I am pretty sure that we will be more in love than ever on our new journey. I believe things happen for a reason like meeting Andrew when we were only in the second grade or being placed in a situation where I don't know a soul and being able to find something in common with another person.
I met my best friend while we were still in our mommies tummies which some think is quite odd for it to be described that way but we enjoy starting our story off that way. We were inseparable until my family moved to Owasso when I was in the second grade but we saw each other as much as possible, thanks to our parents who were best friends too. Then as we got older we would just call on each others birthdays that are six months apart to the day but each year it seemed like we always missed each other. Then came our high school graduations so of course we both drove to watch the other and then college...she went to OSU and I stayed at home. Somehow we both ended up in Stillwater and our life continued like we had never been apart, it was something that is unexplainable but we love it! Our lecture we always received was we aren't the only ones there are others here to see us too. Now life is taking us apart again but I am so proud of her making it into the #1 physical therapy school which is USC!!!!! We have already started saving our pennies so we can take a trip to see her!!
I believe Andrew and I were meant to meet and become best friends. He took the place of Rachie in the sense of being able to look at him and he pretty much knows what I am thinking or finishing my sentences when I can't seem to find the word. Even through my stupid years he was the one that I would turn to when nothing in my life was going the way I wanted it to go but he was there to make everything seem so much better. Life happens for a reason and this one went in the best way possible. With each day our love grows stronger and our bonds grows more and more explainable in actions than in words but our words are strong too. It is hard to believe that we have been together for almost eight years and married for almost five of them! Wow!
I sometime wonder why I was meant to meet my dear Emily Elizabeth. Oh yes I know it is because we are soul mates that just have too much in common not to be best friends like her uncle was my mid high principal, her cousin is married to a public speaker that I have seen several times and the man who helped to invent peanut butter slices on the OSU campus, we both love our dogs like children, and I met her my first day at Joe's Clothes! We were meant to be together and yet again our bond is strange!
There you have it I think those are some of the most current random thought of the day! Time to start my day with the greatest man and sweetest little boy ever!!